CFS - Everyday life

My life is just one big question mark to most people. Having M.E./Chronic Fatigue is something that even the dearest, most understanding people find it hard to get to grips with.

Follows is another poem. I have tried to explain the symptoms generally, rather than writing about the way I feel (although I do feel this way 90% of the time)! It is a matter of fact poem which was kind of weird to write so I'd appreciate it if you'd take a minute to have a read :)

It is a little long, but PLEASE try to read it through. It would mean so much to me if I can get just one person, at least, to paint a better picture in their minds of what it's like to live with M.E.



CFS - EVERYDAY LIFE

M.E. - what on earth does that mean?
Chronic Fatigue. Not particularly cut clean
Anyone wanna explain just what those two things are?
No. Didn't think so. So I'll try to raise the bar
You lose all perspective within your life
One minute your happy, the next full of strife
Some people get CRIPPLING pain & are unable to move
Others just cannot wake up when they would like too
Psychologically you're basically screwed on both days - good or bad
You might as well give up on the life that you previously had
Learn to live the way that your mind & body has mapped out
There's no point in fighting it as you will lose every bout
There are always people who think there's nothing wrong with you
Don't listen to them & just silently wish them in your shoes
You lose some friends. Even the most treasured ones
It turns out they're the ignoramuses - the ones that turn & run
You may be lucky & find somebody who completely understands
They're the ones who you can call on - always there to hold your hand
Living itself isn't easy. Each day brings a new challenge
You find yourself clutching at straws & on a physical & mental scavenge
You'll do anything just to get through another day
But if you try something that antagonises health, boy will you pay
Your body & mind set your limit. The confinement for the day
You may have to just stay in bed but sometimes you're allowed out to play!
Overwhelming tiredness is with you throughout the hours
Any energy you may have had, the body simply devours
One would think that with 'a few good night's sleep', you should feel well & fully recharged
But no. You feel exhausted & unrefreshed for the fatigue, to the front, it has barged
I'm going to run off a list of ways M.E. affects the body & mind
It's gonna be a long one so feel free to pause & rewind
Bear in mind that not everyone with M.E. feels this way all of the time
However we experience all of the afflictions MOST of the time:
There's the dizziness, the nausea, the sore throat & painful glands
The pain in every muscle & joint from the head to feet & hands
The forgetfulness, the memory loss, no ability to concentrate
Sleeping too much, vivid horrible dreams, laying there wide awake
Mood swings like a pendulum, depression, panic attacks
Social ineptness, heartbeat thumping with an almighty smack
Can't stand the light, can't stand the dark
Food, alcohol & rancid smells. The intolerance is so stark
Stomach pain, constipation, diarrhoea. Away you slowly rot
Hot sweats, cold sweats constantly. Body thermostat completely shot
I could go on & on & on but I don't want you to get fed up
Just remember that it's constant for us with M.E. There is just no letup
The act of simply thinking tires to a point where you cannot move
Are you understanding it more? Are you thinking in my groove?
That's it for now. I have no more to say about Chronic Fatigue
I just hope this gives you an inkling & fills you with intrigue


And if you made it this far, please look at another post. Click on the Archive 2009 & the poem Chronic Fatigue Knife explains how I feel personally. It was pretty intense to write & shocked a few people but it's from the heart.

I would love to hear your thoughts on any of my poems but only if you have time.

Thanks for looking

Emmskibeatz x x x

Who, what, where..?

What day is it? What's the time?
Wherabouts am I along my lifeline?
Is the sun shining? Is it pouring with rain?
Who cares when you are riddled with chronic pain?
Where did I go? What haven't I done?
The old me used to have such fun!
There will be tons of things I haven't done
But at least I am blessed with a beautiful son x x